I’m sure most of you were intrigued by the title of this post because you are eyeball deep in the planning process and it may be getting a little overwhelming. The thought “we should just elope” may have crossed your mind a time or two….
Eloping is literally the best thing ever! I know because I did it... yep I was a wedding planner and I eloped. It's not amazing because you want to avoid your mother-in-law or because it saves you thousands of dollars (those are definitely perks).
The real reason everyone should elope is so that you can be 100% present during the most important moment of your life (so far). The thing that couples don’t think about until they are about to walk down that aisle is you are getting up in front of 150+ people and speaking. Not just speaking, but spilling your heart and soul to the one you love.
In my planning days, I cannot tell you how many brides told me they don’t remember a second of their ceremony because they blacked out with fear of public speaking the moment they looked down the aisle and saw hundreds of eager faces. This is literally one of the most important moments of our lives and we don’t remember it?!?!? You are promising the love of your life forever, and you are stumbling over your words, feeling like you are going to pee your pants (in this case, your dress).
Come on ladies, something has got to change here. This is something that you only get to do once (if you do it right) - it’s time to let go of social norms and other people’s expectations and take back your moment. Even if you are totally comfortable speaking in front of that many people, are you actually comfortable bearing your deepest feelings in front of them?
My husband and I (pictured above) wrote our vows to each other only thinking about what we wanted to say to one another, not what may or may not offend someone. Let’s be real, one of the best parts of any relationship is the sex, so you want to be sure to promise each other to maintain that. AND you probably don’t want to do that in front of everyone and their brother - your grandmother may not find it very funny. What I am saying is the ceremony is the time to pour your heart out to your best friend and make promises to each other for a lifetime, like REAL promises. Don’t miss out on this moment because you’re terrified of public speaking or because you don’t want to share anything too intimate in front of your extended family or work colleagues.
Now I am not saying you have to secretly run away and not let anyone be a part of your wedding, I am just saying your ceremony should be private. Whether that means not telling anyone and hopping on a plane to an island in the sun or just having a super intimate ceremony at your venue before the big party. Take your moment. You don’t get a second chance.
A few other EXTRAORDINARY reasons to elope:
1. You get to trash the dress without worrying about looking perfect for a reception. My husband and I did a trash the dress shoot (pictured above) - it was literally one of the most magical moments of my entire life. Even if you aren't into the whole trash the dress thing, you get as much time as you want to create an epic photo shoot since you don't have to be anywhere at a specific time.
2. During your first meal as husband and wife, you actually get to enjoy each other's company AND you actually get to eat the food you are paying for. Plus you get to eat the food you want, where you want to eat it. (We ordered room service- it was seriously the most romantic meal I've ever had! Then we had gelato at 2 am in an infinity pool overlooking the ocean - SO much better than cake.)
3. The amount of money you spend on a wedding can buy an out-of-this-world vacation - stay at a 5 star resort and eat & play like the royalty you are for a fraction of the cost of a wedding. I guess you could even go all the way around the world. (Plus, if you do decide to throw a party for friends and family - it is now a "PARTY" instead of a "WEDDING" which makes everything much cheaper!)
4. Oh AND you get to wear whatever you want - there is zero social pressure about the gown. I mean it is pretty ridiculous that we all think we need to wear these bright white princess gowns that symbolize purity when 99.9% of us are anything but pure haha. When it is just you and the love of your life, you get to wear whatever you feel comfortable in. You could literally wear a bikini.. if that's what you're in to.
PS Stay tuned for the How to Elope Without Pissing Everyone Off (Too Bad) post!